Day 8: A Word of Advice...

I grew up being told that I could be anything I wanted, I could do anything I wanted. I grew up being told that my education and my internal motivation and my ambition were enough, and I could conquer any obstacle.

So, after I finished high school, I dutifully went to college (at a small, private, Christian institution – because I had the extremely misguided notion that large or public universities couldn’t provide a good education), where I spent two and a half years feeling like a complete misfit/idiot, and hating my major.

Were there good things about my college experience? Absolutely. I made some friendships that are strong and long-lasting. I gained a bit of an edge, a step up, if you will, over the naiveté my small-town, homeschooled self had brought with me to the big city. And because of the location, I was fortunate enough to have both an older brother and an older sister living in the same city.

But overall, the experience was basically empty, and amounted to little more than two and a half years of wasted time and a lot of wasted money. 

I always had good intentions of going back to college – I was going to take a year off, figure out what I wanted to do, and then find another school, transfer in all my courses (I was a bit of an idealist about the whole thing, obviously), and simply continue where I had left off. But then one year turned into two, and then five, and then before I knew it, I was staring down the barrel of being almost thirty years old, with no degree, nothing that appeared marketable on paper.

So I spent some time trying to figure out what I wanted, what I enjoy doing, and I went back to school in 2011, where I completed an A.A.S. degree in Criminal Justice and Psychology. I plan to complete a bachelor’s in Psychology within the next two years, as well, and then continue on to get a Master’s.

I still don’t know what I want to be “when I grow up”. I still don’t know how it’s all going to pan out, or even what an “ideal” version of this looks like in my head. I’m still formulating, and thinking, and changing, and questioning myself.

C.S. Lewis once said, “You are never too old to set another goal, or dream a new dream”.

I love that. That is the line that inspired me to go back to school, even when I felt like I was too old, like too much time had passed. And that is the line that I think about every day still, when I feel like I’m too old to be competing with fresh-faced twenty-two year olds for jobs, when I want to cry because I feel like I’ve done nothing but waste my time up til now, when I’m struggling under the weight of even more schooling, more papers, more stressing over midterms and grades.

My advice to you, then, is to take that quote to heart for yourself, as well. Learn it, live it, love it. You are NEVER too old. You can always make a change, even if that change involves starting completely over, and having to work your way up from the bottom of the proverbial food chain.

It doesn’t matter what you’re doing, or how much time you’ve invested in it. If it’s not something you love, find something that is, and do that. It may not be easy, and it may take a long time, but if you have the strength to dream it, you have the strength to do it. 

In an effort to write more frequently, I decided to take part in the Blogging Every Day in May challenge. I know I’m coming into it a few days behind, so I’ll be posting quite a few things in the next couple days as I get caught up. 

Day 7: Things That Go "Bump" in the Night....

In an effort to write more frequently, I decided to take part in the Blogging Every Day in May challenge. I know I’m coming into it a few days behind, so I’ll be posting quite a few things in the next couple days as I get caught up. 

I have a lot of fears. Some of them are rational (getting hit by a drunk driver, going off the road in bad weather), but most are not. I am okay with this, despite the fact that sometimes, my fears cause me mild embarrassment.

More than pretty much anything else in the world, I am scared of the dark. I know, I know, it’s kind of juvenile, and completely ridiculous. Rationally, I know that there is nothing that can hurt me in the dark that couldn’t also hurt me in the light. I know that turning off my bedroom light does not actually send a signal to all the monsters lurking about that it’s okay for them to come in and start haunting me. I know that 99.999% of all the things that scare me about the dark are completely made up in my head, and have absolutely no bearing on reality whatsoever. Doesn’t matter. I’m still terrified. 

I have thankfully progressed past the point of sleeping with my lights on all the time, but I do still have to have a TV on or something, which isn’t exactly healthy, but is at least marginally better than not sleeping at all because I’m too nervous there’s something creeping up next to my bed to eat my face off or something. Big thanks to Amberly for sharing her fear and letting me know I’m not alone in this!!

I am also extremely scared of water when I can’t see what’s around me. I am a strong swimmer, and I love being in pools, regardless of depth, but put me in a lake or a river, and I freak right out. The ocean, however, doesn’t scare me one bit. I know that’s weird, since the ocean is home to way more things that could kill me than a lake or river, not the mention the fact that the ocean itself could kill me without any help from its inhabitants. Be that as it may, however, I would take the ocean any day over a river or lake.

One quick side note about the fear of water thing….I used to be much more afraid of deep water than I am now, even in a pool. I remember when I would go to the indoor pool in my town when I was growing up – it is an Olympic sized pool with a 12-foot deep end, and if it wasn’t very full, I would always imagine something completely silly and irrational like there being a shark or something in the water. Has anyone else ever experienced that??

I also have a strong fear of tanning beds. (Weird? Not weird? I don't know.) I have always been somewhat claustrophobic, so they’re a little unnerving just for the shut-in aspect alone, but ever since I saw the preview to whatever Final Destination movie it was where the girl died in a malfunctioning tanning bed, I’ve been considerably more terrified. It works out okay for me usually, since I don’t tan very often anyway, but on the rare occasions that I do, I have to consciously work to slow my breathing and heart rate, and not freak the heck out and break stuff/burn myself.

What scares you the most, and what do you do to deal with it?

Day 6: What Do You Do?

In an effort to write more frequently, I decided to take part in the Blogging Every Day in May challenge. I know I’m coming into it a few days behind, so I’ll be posting quite a few things in the next couple days as I get caught up. 

 

Day 6’s challenge is to explain what I do, without saying “my job”. This is actually pretty easy, considering that I am between jobs right now. J

On a typical day, I mostly do a lot of reading. Like, A LOT. I read blogs, news articles, books, magazines, etc. I love reading, and processing, and thinking. Sometimes I write about what I read, sometimes I don’t. 

Even if I’m not writing something to be published, I do a lot of writing in general, whether it’s a journal, a note, an email…. I enjoy writing, and I find it to be a very relaxing hobby. I’ve actually been writing a lot more lately than I used to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m just getting into the habit of writing all the time, because of the blog, or if it’s just because I have kind of found a groove with it, but either way, I am loving it, even when I write stuff that no one else even sees.

Sometimes I’ll watch a little TV. I’ve been watching Damages on Netflix lately, and am borderline obsessed. However, I try to limit myself to only one episode per day, since I don’t want to spend all my time just sitting around watching TV like a couch potato. 

I also try to go for a walk each day. It doesn’t always happen because, let’s be honest, sometimes I get lazy. But I do try. And I make sure I talk to Boyfriend every day, since we are still long-distance for about another week (ahhhh, I’m so excited to not be long-distance anymore!!!). We text each other a lot throughout the day, and then usually talk on the phone for an hour or two each night.

Aaannnnnd I usually drink at least one of these every day. They’re probably terrible for me
(although at only 80 calories and 19g of sugar for the whole can, I would probably do a lot worse with just a cup of coffee), but I don’t even care. They’re just delicious and I love them.

So there you have it – my really exciting life! What do YOU do?

Day 5: Publicly Admitting Blog Love...

In an effort to write more frequently, I decided to take part in the Blogging Every Day in May challenge. I know I’m coming into it a few days behind, so I’ll be posting quite a few things in the next couple days as I get caught up.

Day Five of this challenge is all about publicly confessing my love and admiration for a fellow blogger (or bloggers, as the case may be is). I was super excited about this, because I have really grown to enjoy quite a few blogs, and I’m thrilled to share them with you!

At the top of my list is Bethany Grow, from Love Grows Design. I randomly stumbled across her blog Love the Grows (now retired) on Pinterest while I was looking for date ideas and I was instantly hooked. She is incredibly sweet and talented, and her blog is so refreshing to read. Even though she focuses almost entirely on design in her current blog, she still manages to write something that hits home with me in my own non-design-centered life. I was actually inspired to start blogging on my own because of Bethany’s blog, so she deserves a special shout-out. And besides all that….really, how can you look at this adorable smile and not smile yourself? J

I’ve also been following Katie, at All Things Katie Marie for a while now. She posts a lot of really great stuff, like recipes, DIY and craft tips, gift ideas, event planning tips, classroom ideas for teachers, and (my personal favorite part) the outfits she puts together! Katie is so talented at putting together the perfect party, creating stylish outfits, and revitalizing spaces. I have modeled many an outfit of my own after her creations as well, which is great, since I myself have absolutely no sense of style whatsoever.

Another great blog that I have only recently discovered, but find to be completely hilarious, is Katy's blog Adventures In Adulthood. She writes from the perspective of a recent college graduate who doesn't necessarily have all the answers about where her life will take her in upcoming years. I can really identify with her writing, and every one of her posts has made me think, made me giggle, or both! 

What blogs do you love? Leave me a link in the comments, and I’ll be sure to check them out!

Day 4: My Favorite Quote

In an effort to write more frequently, I decided to take part in the Blogging Every Day in May challenge. I know I’m coming into it a few days behind, so I’ll be posting quite a few things in the next couple days as I get caught up.

I love quotes. I am nowhere near as eloquent or deep as I like to think I am, so I often rely on quotes to convey how I am feeling, or to share a message I don’t know how to say on my own. However, there are a few quotes that I love just a little bit more than all the rest, and even though I’m only supposed to pick one, I’m going to share them all here anyway. J

“Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than you.” – Dr. Seuss

There are so many reasons that I love this quote, but the main one is that it really helps me feel like being me is something special, and that I should revel in my me-ness, because really, nobody else does it better! That’s inspiring for days when I feel like I am failing at everything.

“The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.” – Marcus Aurelius 

This quote serves as an excellent reminder to me to make sure that my thoughts point me in the direction I want to go. I am a staunch believer in the notion that a person’s thoughts determine their disposition and their reactions to life, so this quote helps me remember to think positively all the time (which doesn’t always happen, by the way….but I do try).

“Life becomes infinitely easier once you learn to accept an apology you never got.” – Unknown

I have no idea where I first saw this quote, but I’ll be damned if it’s not one of the most true statements ever made. As I am sure is the case with everyone, I have been in a lot of situations where people have wronged me terribly, and have never apologized. For a long time, I would harbor resentment against these people, and would allow myself to get angry at them. And then I realized that my being angry at them doesn’t do anything to them, but it sure does make my life way less fun than it could be. So I made a point to forgive people, even if they’re not sorry. Forgiveness is more for the forgiver than the forgive, after all, and I can’t even begin to tell you how much better my life and general attitude has been since I made this change.

What about you? What’s your favorite quote, and why do you like it?