Things I say every day as an adult

Full disclosure: I got this awesome idea from the one and only Miss Kaylee. I am not cool enough to come up with stuff like this on my own. 

I've always been a talker. As basically anyone who knows me well could tell you, I tend to process things best when I talk them out. Over the years, my inner monologue, and thus what I end up saying, has evolved considerably, and I often catch myself saying things that I never thought I would say. 

A few examples...

I don't care if it's only 7:30pm, I'm tired, and I want to go to bed. 

Um, no thanks, I don't really want to go out to dinner tonight. 

Good grief, I have to shower again? I JUST DID IT YESTERDAY. 

Well, I don't have my planner in front of me right now, so I honestly have no idea if I'm free at that time. 

Mornings are my least favorite thing. (Just kidding, that's not new, that's been around forever. Haha.)

Flossing is seriously like, my favorite thing. 

Good grief, can't people write songs about anything other than sex anymore? 

I wish my dad was here. (That's not a new thing either, if we're being honest. But it is something I say every day.)

No, I really don't want any candy. 

Except those Three Musketeers bars in the cupboard aren't going to eat themselves. 

I should definitely work out today. 

I definitely didn't work out today. I'm such a failure. 

Ugh, I hate grocery shopping. Can't we pay somebody to do that for us?? 

Are you kidding me? No, I'm not paying that much for that. Absolutely not. 

*sigh* I wish I had more money. 

Good grief, I have absolutely no sense of style whatsoever. I am such an embarrassment to myself every time I leave the house. 

I love technology, but seriously, it's really kind of a pain in the ass. 

WHY DO HIGH HEELS HAVE TO BE A THING??? 

Ugh, I'm so old. All my bones hurt. 

It's going to rain today. I can feel it in my bones. (Side note: I'm right on that front about 95% of the time.)

Well, if I already ate dinner, then that means my day is basically over, so I can go fall asleep now, right?

What do you say every day as an adult that you didn't really see coming?? 

Check out my fabulous sponsor!

Secret Single Behavior

Disclaimer: I totally copied this idea from Juliette. So please make sure to read her post about this, too. 


If you've ever watched the show "Sex and the City", you know that it's about four single girls, living the single life in Manhattan, and making it look totally and completely affordable and glamorous. In reality, it's probably not either of those things. But either way, they make that sh*t look gooooood.

So anyway, in one episode, Carrie and the girls are discussing what Carrie referred to as "SSB", or Secret Single Behavior - i.e. stuff that we do when we're alone that we don't want anyone else to see. Her particular vice is eating saltine crackers covered in grape jelly while standing up in the kitchen reading fashion magazines. Miranda, ever the analytical one, wonders why she chooses grape jelly, but of course Carrie can't explain...."It just feels so good!"

After reading Juliette's list, I got to thinking about my own SSBs. And even though I won't let any of you come and share my activities with me, I will let you in on the secrets. Or at least a few of them, anyway.

1 // I like to sit backwards on the couch and watch TV upside down. I don't do it all the time, but sometimes it just feels really good. But it looks crazy, so I only do it when I'm alone.

2 // I will check my eyebrows incessantly. Chances are, if I went into a salon to get a wax, they'd recoil in horror at how overly-and-terribly-plucked they are. But doing that would ruin all my fun of constantly playing with sharp tweezers near my eyes, and we can't have that, now, can we?

3 // I will binge watch reality television. Jersey Shore? I freaking loathe that show, but if I happen across it while I'm just sitting there doing nothing (or watching upside down), I'll probably watch it. And yes, I am aware that Jersey Shore is basically a documentary on everything that is wrong with America, but sometimes I just can't help myself. And/or I don't want to. And yes, I know I deserve to be judged for this one.


4 // I stretch. Now, I have been known to also stretch when Boyfriend is around...But I kind of prefer not to, since I am about as ungraceful as they come. When normal people stretch, they look all cute and put together and graceful. When I try it, I tend to look like a camel on an ice rink. Only I'm totally not flexible, so it just looks sad and pathetic.

5 // I listen to terrible music and have dance parties with myself. Macarena? Yep. Electric Slide? ALL OVER IT. Cupid Shuffle. That just happened.

6 // I spend ridiculous amounts of time perusing Pinterest and Twitter. I don't know why. I just do.

7 // I have pretend conversations with other people, out loud, even though I'm alone. This is something I've done my whole life, actually.. It helps me process when I think out loud, or imagine conversations happening and speak out loud the ways I would respond to the weird conversations occurring in my head.

8 // I slather vaseline all over my lips and just wait for it to be absorbed, instead of wiping it off the skin around my mouth so it just looks like lip gloss. I usually end up looking like a 3 year old who got into Mommy's makeup, but I don't even care.