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Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Day 25: When She Said...

I have been through a lot of difficult stuff in my life. Nothing terribly earth-shattering, like a potentially terminal medical diagnosis, or the death of a parent, but some pretty tough things, all the same. There have been a lot of times when I really didn’t think I’d make it through the crisis of the moment, and I certainly never would have thought that the way I handle things would have had any kind of positive effect on anyone else. I always felt like I muddled through stuff, and the only reason I would come out the other side is because, well, life moves on, and that’s just how it works.

But there was something especially traumatic and difficult that happened in my life just about five years ago. I was talking to one of my girlfriend’s about it (we’ll call her Ani), a friend who knows about pretty much all of the other rot I’ve experienced in my life, and she made a comment that has stuck with me to this day. She told me that not only did she think I was handling the situation extremely well, but also that I am “one of the strongest people” she knows, and that if anybody could deal with all the mess and come out shining, it would be me.

I was shocked by that. There I was, struggling to get through every day, wondering how I’d get to sleep at night and then how I’d get out of bed in the morning, and she tells me that I’m strong. I had felt anything but strong up until that point, but her words helped me find and recognize in myself the strength she saw.

Sadly, my life has not really settled down too much since that point, but her kind words have remained in my head through every calamity. I am forever grateful to Ani for her sweetness, for her faith in me, and for recognizing in me a quality I didn’t see on my own.

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